God is the path to God. Ordinary love is somewhat like a dream: you become attached to the object of love, you begin to be jealous of him, you begin to control him, and your greed and jealousy immediately drives out all love. Love is destroyed. By wanting to take possession of the object of love, you lose

Recently, a lot of information has appeared about goals, achievements and success. There are many books, trainings, seminars. Accordingly, many build a business on this.

Basically these materials are very similar. Goal setting, time management, fighting fears. Or visualization, reframing, influencing the subconscious.

Traditionally, fashion comes from the West. Therefore, Western methods and the Western style of presenting information are held in high esteem.

I want to talk about a more eastern approach to achieving goals. I will not encourage giving up goals or advocating giving up material possessions.

This is an extremely clear and simple way of a minimalist.

So, we talked about the difference in approaches. I have already written a series of articles about the importance of the process and. Read them, refresh your memory.

The Western approach is to identify a specific goal, break the achievement into stages and achieve results.

The Eastern approach is to understand your values, motives and your deepest purpose. Get a vision of the future, understand your path and let go of your goal...

You must have a goal, not it you. Achieving a goal is not as important as the journey you take.

In general, many things in our society are overrated. Victories are very important for a person. The spirit of competition is strong. Competition rules the roost.

Due to the increased significance of the moment, winning competitions is much more difficult. During training, you can show excellent results, but stumble one step before victory. On the other hand, of course, through hard training, adrenaline rush and full concentration, you can achieve success. But such a result requires much more effort.

Examples of unsuccessful movement towards a goal

Once at a bowling alley, I threw the ball twice and knocked down all the pins both times. For 3 strikes the establishment gives a small gift, so I tensed up. I decided that I would win this gift right now. And he immediately missed. And if I had not chased the result, I would most likely have achieved it.

Girls are programmed from childhood to get married and have children. This is an instinct reinforced by society. They strive to get married, and not to find a happy family. To give birth to a child, and not to raise a worthy member of society.

For some reason they think that after marriage or having children, life itself will become much better. Therefore, they are not ready for difficulties.

As a result, many of them end up marrying people they don't like. They give birth to children, live and suffer. They often get divorced, but more often they endure. After 10-20 years of living together and experiencing trials, sometimes feelings, calmness, and understanding of each other come.

But not to everyone. Are you willing to spend 10-20 years figuring out whether you will be happy with this person? Why not choose the same one from the beginning? Why not make your relationships ideal when you are young?

Guys also quickly start a family when they approach 30 years of age. In girls, this desire manifests itself much earlier.

Guys, especially those closer to thirty, have a need for self-realization, high status, good earnings, and possession of property (apartment, house, car). And often it doesn’t matter what method.

That's why they throw themselves into all sorts of troubles - they go to work, work hard at a job they don't like, open a business that makes them sick, and get involved with crime. This is also IMHO flushing life down the toilet. You can try everything (except maybe crime), but you should only go where you like to be.

A pleasant path leading to a cherished goal

I thought a little and came up with a few patterns. They are also recipes for achieving a goal comfortably. Without breaking yourself and overcoming unnecessary difficulties. Here I will describe the thesis, and then write a couple of real examples from my life.

The goal is a state, not a moment. There is no need to strive for a certain moment in life. Strive for condition. This goal is very vague and that’s what’s good about it. A state of happiness, harmony, calmness, joy - this is not “buying a car”.

The path is more important than the goal itself. HOW you go is a little more important than WHERE. The destination can evoke any emotions in you (you don’t even really know what), but the path to it should be bright and filled with pleasant emotions. When the path is important, difficulties are pleasant.

Achieving the goal is not necessary. The goal should not own you. You can cancel it at any time. This should not be a cause of discomfort.

The goal is development. One of the highest goals of a person should be development. Daily and continuous. You are on the path of self-improvement. It not only brings joy. But also the results - you live longer, and more qualitatively and happily. Having identified a goal and developing in its direction, you will definitely achieve it.

Examples from life

Most likely, I could not express in words what I wanted to convey. It's a very delicate matter. So I'll tell you a couple of my real life examples. I already wrote that. Now I’ll tell you a little more.

Scripts for sale

Once upon a time, I really wanted to develop my own online store for selling digital goods. I didn’t know how to program then, I understood little about marketing and sales, but I saw what I wanted. I admired Vadim Lasto, Brake and other ideologists of software solutions.

Now I am selling scripts using my own scripts for selling digital goods. That's a pun. The point is that I came where I wanted, and automatically. He understood programming, wrote scripts for himself, and tinkered with the code. This was interesting to me.

Gradually, I began to find and come up with solutions that people need. Now I am a real script seller.

Dream girl

Once upon a time I wanted to meet the girl of my dreams. There was a certain vision. In the end, I came to this. I've been living with her for 2 years now, and I'm getting married very soon.

None of the couples I know can boast of such a good relationship as ours. We don't even feel comfortable talking about them. Everyone else talks about problems, complains about their other halves, but at the same time does not want to change. We both moved towards such relationships, developed, changed ourselves for the better.

Do you know when I met her? When I was looking the least. That is, of course, I was not against the meeting, but I had no goal of starting an affair or starting a long-term relationship.

Girls are attracted to exactly the kind of guys who treat them with coldness, do not depend on them, but on the contrary show their independence...

Then I got carried away and I decided to write an article soon about how to meet the girl of my dreams :)

The essence

Draw your own conclusions. This is not the first time that I have personally been convinced in practice that independence from a goal is strength.

So, the stages of achieving any goal:

1. Choosing a direction. It is sometimes very difficult to understand where you want to go, what to do, what brings you joy. This can be done by trying. Just try whatever interests you.
2. Movement in the right direction, development in this. When you realize that you want to achieve certain results in something, commit to it to the fullest. The result is not important, what is important is your interest and pleasure from the actions.

Many people have heard about the state of “flow”. When you are captivated by some action. So much so that you stop noticing everything around you. So, immerse yourself in it, choke on what you love, go deeper and deeper.

As a result, after a while you will begin to wonder. When you realize that you have everything you dreamed of. And you won't be able to stop. And you will move on.

Cineas, a student of Demosthenes, once asked Pyrrhus, king of Epirus: “Sovereign, what will we do after conquering Italy?” - “Let's conquer Sicily.” - "And then?" - “Let's conquer Africa.” - "And then?" - “We will conquer Macedonia and Greece.” - "And then?" - “We will live happily, eat, drink and be merry.” - “So what’s stopping us from doing this now?” Pyrrhus laughed, but still started the war.
It is not clear why Kineas began this dialogue: either out of a desire to entertain the king with a verbal balancing act, or he really believed that the goal as a result of any activity is more important than this activity itself.
However, this approach means underestimating the real relationship between the meaning of the goal and the path to it.
Indeed, in the above dialogue, Pyrrhus declares rest as the goal of his life, and war as the way to achieve it.
However, since rest is possible without war, as Cineas correctly noted, we come to the inevitable conclusion that for Pyrrhus the path is more important than the goal itself, and the goal itself exists only as a formal justification for his struggle.
What was the idea of ​​a kingdom of universal brotherhood and justice for the Narodnaya Volya and other Russian revolutionaries?
This idea (goal) was nothing more than a means to justify their struggle. A struggle in the name of a great, noble and, most importantly, unattainable goal.
That is why the revolutionaries themselves said that the kingdom of justice could not be achieved either during their lifetime or during the lifetime of many subsequent generations. The inaccessibility of the goal means and justifies the infinity of their war, war as the path of life.
That is why the revolutionaries were of little interest in how life would be organized in the future kingdom of justice. They always thought of this kingdom only in the roughest terms and, as a rule, did not go further than the ideals of barracks communism.
That is why revolutionaries have always paid much more attention to demonstrating their readiness to die for an idea than to developing the idea itself.
If all these revolutionaries found themselves in the kingdom of justice for which they fought, they would immediately declare this kingdom cannibalistic and begin to destroy it, because their path is war, and the goal does not matter.
Struggle as a life path is evidence of a high level of vital energy, what Gumilyov called passionarity.
It was this vital energy and thirst for struggle that led Pyrrhus to Heraclea, and the People’s Volunteers to the place of their murder of Tsar Alexander.
Faust is also the embodiment of this spirit of struggle. Nothing seduces him: neither wealth, nor Helen of Troy herself, but only the awareness of the impending endless battle between people and the elements gives him a feeling of the fullness of life and makes him stop the moment.
That is why war is more valuable than peace, and peace has value only as a means to new wars. The path is more valuable than the goal, for the path is life itself.

Every person has some kind of dream. It’s just that some people don’t realize this and think that they don’t dream of anything. In fact, all people tend to desire happiness, success at work, a better family life, etc.

As soon as a person realizes a dream, it immediately becomes a goal. Conscious the goal is much easier to achieve. However, understanding how important it is in this matter, we offer you 3 important steps towards your goal.

So, let's go!

Step 1: Get rid of clutter

Perhaps someone will smile from such funny advice. After all, what does clutter in your home really have to do with it if the problem is somewhere in the soul.

But we should not forget that we humans are unique psycho-physical beings. And the material world influences us just as much as the non-material world.

Therefore, do not underestimate the importance of this step. Now let's see what types of junk exist.

This completes the first step. We hope that you were able to grasp the essence, and not specific settings.

Step 2: Find useful information

The ancient sage Ecclesiastes said: “There is nothing new under.” And this is true. It is stupid and pointless to dream about something without trying to study the experiences of other people. In this sense, an important step towards the goal is the search for information.

Based on the psychological characteristics of a person, we can recommend you a very interesting technique. Let's call it the obstacle method. What is it?

Obstacle method

For example, you want to go to. But here you have many obstacles: it’s expensive, and there’s no one to go with, and it’s scary, and there are no normal travel companies, etc.

If you simply share this dream with your friends, acquaintances and relatives, most likely they will dissuade you.

However, if you use the obstacle method, everything changes in a striking way. Instead of saying, “I want to go to,” say, “I wanted to go to Africa, but...” and list a bunch of reasons why this can’t happen.

So a person is designed in such a way that the interlocutor on a subconscious level will begin to convince you (that is, argue with you), finding explanations for certain things and offering original ways to solve complex issues.

We assure you that with this simple technique you can get valuable information from a variety of people. Moreover, this could be anyone, even a random fellow traveler on a train or a taxi driver.

By the way, this method of obtaining useful information was used by many ancient Greek sages and philosophers.

Like-minded people

Many people are afraid of being “out of place.” However, on the way to the goal, finding like-minded people is the most important step. For example, you want to write a book. But you have no idea how this could happen.

Don’t be afraid to attend relevant events, trainings, exhibitions and conferences. Don't think that everyone there is too smart and your "stupid ideas" will seem laughable.

In fact, it is in such communities (both real and virtual) that you can glean the most useful information for achieving your dreams.

Books

And, of course, we cannot fail to mention the importance of books in this context. Any reference literature, encyclopedias and thematic manuals of the relevant focus will help you in solving many issues.

Watching videos, listening to audio are all good, but nothing can replace reading a book. Keep this in mind when searching for useful information.

Step 3: Swim Upstream

This step on the way to the goal is especially important. Surely many have heard that they had a phenomenal memory and fantastic performance, read 400 pages every day, and constantly exhausted their body with physical training.

Many similar examples can be given. What do they all have in common? They swam against the tide. They tried to be the first in everything, and this meant constantly overcoming themselves.

You can often hear the phrase: “...he feels good, he has innate abilities.” But the great inventor and scientist Thomas Edison said: “Genius is 1% talent and 99% labor.” Remember this.

However, in the subconscious, our inner “I” can find very serious reasons not to move towards the goal. How many of you are not familiar with “convincing” arguments of reason:

• Unfortunately, I'm tired today;
• No, I'm too busy;
• Alas, I lost interest;
• Still, it’s time to rest;
• I’ll surf the Internet for a bit, and then I’ll get straight to work;
• Maybe I don't need this at all?

To overcome these internal excuses that keep you from achieving your desired goal for years, use simple techniques.

Little by little, but regularly

I don’t want to - I won’t

There are days when you absolutely don’t want to do what you need to do. In this case, it is strongly recommended not to break yourself, but to be the master of the situation. If you don’t want to do something on principle, well, you don’t need to.

At the end of the day, you are in control of the situation, not the situation. Although at this moment you should be careful not to go to the opposite extreme: completely stop moving towards the goal.

Atmosphere

Create an atmosphere in your home and workplace so that everything reminds you of your goal. Stickers, reminders, etc. - everything should tell you about the goal towards which you are moving. Do not underestimate this point, as it has repeatedly proven its effectiveness.

We hope that 3 important steps towards your goal will help you achieve your dream. The main thing is to act. Don’t be afraid of obstacles, carry out your plans despite everything.

And remember the wonderful Roman proverb: “He who walks makes the road.”

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The path to the goal is not easy, like any path that leads upward. It is almost inevitable that we will face many difficulties on the way up. This can be both external circumstances and our internal state. But the main thing in this path is not the goal itself, but what we have to become in order to achieve it.

If you have already decided what your goal will be, then the first thing you should understand is that difficulties are good. Difficulties are exactly what separates us from the goal, and since they exist, it means we are moving.

Let's look at the path to the goal and the emotional states we will go through until we achieve success.

1. Invitation

The first thing that appears on the way to a goal is an invitation to start. This is something that interested us. Something we wanted to make a part of our lives. But this is not just a desire, but also a path, the first outlines of which have appeared before us.

At this stage we decide to go forward or not to go forward. Everything seems simple and clear, and the goal is easily achievable.

2. Enthusiasm

A person begins to make his first efforts, he himself is delighted that he has begun the journey of his dream. The feeling at this stage is complete satisfaction that a start has been made. And once it has been established, then success is almost in your hands!

3. Skin of an unkilled bear

Enthusiasm reaches its peak. In the imagination, a person has already achieved everything he dreamed of. Mentally, he is already beginning to think about how he will heal now! But unfortunately, a person forgets that he has taken only a few small steps, and there are thousands of them ahead.

Of course, the most important thing is to start, but that's not all.

4. First difficulties

The first difficulties appear, which slightly cool a person’s ardor. The man begins to stumble. Previously, he was walking along the asphalt road, but now he left it. There is a lack of experience and knowledge.

5. It's not that simple

The understanding comes that everything is not so simple. A person's enthusiasm receives the first big blow. The path to the goal is no longer saturated with such euphoria. Irritation is growing.

At this stage, many people quit, only to receive an invitation again after a while. Desire never goes away!

6. Persistence

If a person does not quit, then he tries to find some kind of support to continue, but the enthusiasm is no longer the same. And a person finds support in perseverance. “I have decided and will move further along this path!” Oddly enough, it helps and confidence gradually begins to return.

7. Doubt in the case

A person learns more and more about his dream. It is already acquiring realistic outlines, and negative features are already noticeable. Maybe this goal is not worth all these sacrifices? Maybe it's time to give it all up?

At this stage, a certain number of people are eliminated. But what makes those who remain move forward? Again, persistence. “If this goal is worthless, then what is worth it?”

8. Self-doubt

Difficulties grow and then a person thinks that maybe it’s about him and not about the goal? Maybe he is not worthy of this goal? This caustic thought weeds out a lot of people.
But what is holding the rest back? And the rest spit on doubts. Perseverance saves them. They no longer do it for themselves, they already have a mission. What does it matter whether a person is worthy? The point is the main thing.

9. Lack of results

The next obstacle is the lack of visible results. A lot of effort has already been put in, but there is still no return. The goal still seems far away. Of course, this is an illusion; in fact, the goal is approaching.

It can be compared to a journey. When half the journey has already been completed, but the person is not yet at his destination and this point is not even visible on the horizon. It may seem like everything is in vain! But that's not true. The result will not be visible for a long time, but this does not mean that the person is on the wrong path. The critical point has simply not yet been passed.

10. Pride in what you have done

It is pride in what one has done that saves a person. Yes, the result is not yet visible, but the amount of work is amazing. And this, together with perseverance, gives strength to move on. It's like a marathon. When a person has already run out of strength (stages 7 and 8) and the only thing that makes him run is persistence. Suddenly, it becomes a little easier and a second wind opens.

I would like to note that stages 7-10 can be repeated several times, depending on the complexity of the goal. And all along the way there will be people who dissuade you, who say that nothing will work out.

11. Faith

It's darkest before dawn. Resistance is strongest when we are about to break through circumstances. At this stage, perseverance already develops into faith, when everyone around already has doubts. This is the moment of hesitation when 99% of the work has already been done. But the resistance and uncertainty are such that you want to give up.

12. Success

Success finally comes. All the work that a person has put into achieving a goal begins to bear fruit.

But the main value here is not in achieving the goal, but in the fact that the path itself has changed a person, giving him the experience of overcoming that will allow him to win in the future.